THE SILENT WIND

She is like the wind that has no sound
that leaves no trace or path of where it has been

She is like a shadow left by the sun behind her
that is no more and has disappeared
leaving only darkness in it's wake

she is like the burning embers from a fire
that once burned bright but now only
darkness remains in the silent wind
and nothing remains

she is like the leaves that tremble as
they fall, bereft of tears as they are carried
by the wind with no sound into and endless
void where the silence is complete
Image Taken From Morgue File and Digitized as Art

****BECOMING INVISIBLE****

The edge of our reality can end
where our vision sees no longer
the man or woman growing older
becoming invisible as though
swallowed up in the mist
a dense fog masquerading
as a wall forthwith the
door is closed

They are forgotten are they not
beyond the noise and bustle
of the cities they once
inhabited, sustained to
hold strong protecting
those young and growing
until the tie then
is thus broken

Then they are contained inside
four walls of the homes
we have banished them to
as they wait in lonely rooms
long hallways where signs
saying exit are never
meant for them
but only for us

Their tears of despair turning
to fear and anger toward those
who leave them there to
languish with strangers
who do not know them
who only change bed sheets
give medication unknown
then turn to go

They will find no solace here
amidst disinfectant where
even germs are not wanted
they cannot find the warmth
of their own bed, the safety
of familiar things
for the edge of their reality
diminishes in the sea of ours

© May 2016
Renee Espriu

Image Taken & Digitized by Myself

 

Invisible

My father went missing some three to four years ago now but we were fortunate. My sister who lives with him did not wait long and sent someone to look for him, even though the police did not consider him missing. The allotted time was not up. Now we have the newest thing, the ‘Silver Alert’, to look for the elderly amongst us who turn up missing every day.

Recently, my uncle and my father’s brother, also went missing. His family did not look but waited until a ‘Silver Alert’ was in place. After four days they found him in a church parking lot in his truck waiting for help. At 94 years of age, he was known to be in good health. But his adult children are too busy with their lives to consider him and knew nothing of their father’s well being nor did they keep in touch often enough to know if he was alright. He is now in the hospital, a shadow of his former self, prior to having gone missing. His children have finally come but we believe, to only say their good-byes.

In our Western society, convalescent homes have become the norm, a place in which to put our growing older population because there is no longer time for them. In certain circumstances this might be an option but in so many cases, families simply do not know what to do with their elders when they become frail, in poor health or have various stages of memory loss.

My uncle could have more time even beyond his 94yrs but his adult children have been raised in a society to not see beyond the option of a place where someone else will care for them. My sister has difficulty understanding it but in reality it is yet, another system in our society, that is flawed and that leaves us still with more questions than answers. I feel compelled to write this for him, Hector Dickens, who now no longer has a voice in his life.

Ironic, one might say, how the words beckon us to convey a message and how life comes full circle in the saying of them. My uncle passed away this morning, perhaps even as I wrote the above words. He will be missed.

***LIKE CHINESE LANTERNS***

she stands & watches
as leaves fall from the trees
letting go; let go
upon the brisk winds
of mother nature’s tide

some still remain
as the tree bows her head
bending from side to side
the rain like tears
drop one upon another
pooling at her feet

sprawling roots
upon the ground
anchoring her down
& in that moment
all that is heard
is the sound of sorrow

freedom unleashed
on a tide akin to a river
of sparkling colors
like Chinese lanterns
floating alight
with dreams within

© November 2, 2014
Renee Espriu

Image Taken From Morgue File & Digitally Altered by Myself

Image of Chinese Lantern

I Feel An Angel

Night Dew Angels

Altered Google Image

while the crescent moon
is high in the sky
somewhere between
dawn & midnight

I feel an angel
pass by this way

when the dampness of dew
is held softly on grass
looking much like tears
shed in sadness cast

I feel an angel
pass by this way

my mind wraps ’round
old sayings & things
‘when you hear a bell
an angel gets their wings’

I feel an angel
pass by this way

when I smell the scent
of a forgotten perfume
or fragrant flowers
within my room

I feel an angel
pass by this way

though scripted not
in the time after passing
& the harshness
of the hour has gone
never lasting

I feel an angel
pass by this way

now of spiritual grace
they fill the space
so unforgiving
once void of all
that was
theirs’ in living

I feel an angel
pass by this way

© October 2013

Renee Espriu

I Considered Myself

Soldier

Google Image

I consider myself to be
a peaceful person
living in a place
not fraught with war
void of detonating bombs
fragments of life gone

I consider myself but
to no avail
for the rumbling of war
has never been far
as off in the distance
on foreign soils
it creeps very close
to my own back door

I considered myself to be
living my life apart
even during Viet Nam years
seen on broadcast news
of death and others tears
of something I was
unable to touch

I considered myself & then
my son joined in the ranks
of men and women called
to fight in a war fueled
by the inner turmoil
of a people distant
and out of sight

I considered myself to be
untouched by the carnage
the destruction of
people unknown to me
whose lives were
never mentioned

I considered myself & then
you came home & you
seemed different
for you brought the
memories with you
that now touch my life
to forever affect it
with war

© September 2013
Renee Espriu

I have known many who became soldiers. My own father and his brothers fought in World War II, my brother was in service during Viet Nam but did not see battle. But when my own son went to the Middle East, even though he was fortunate enough not to have had to be in a battle, he saw enough of the aftermath, that it has affected his life in ways I will never be able to understand.  For most soldiers do not speak of what they have seen and heard but these things, I know, cannot be erased from memory.

http://intothebardo.wordpress.com

The Piano

The Piano

Altered Google Image

you set waiting amongst others of your kind
housing the large harp within your casing
standing upright and waiting for that one
that would love you enough to once again

lovingly ply your ivory keys with passionate
longing to coax musical notes waiting to
escape the dust that has settled upon them
in an effort to come alive, notes chording

to no longer set idle in bitter loneliness
but belong in the midst of those that would
wipe away the weary years with but a touch
of shine from joyous tears that melodies sign

will rise like timeless orchestrated sighs
bringing rays of light into lives one true
measure you will no longer wait in silence
but fill empty hours with unending pleasure

© March 2013
Renee Espriu

 

http://dversepoets.com/category/negative-capability/

The Color of Taffy

taffy colored

Google Image

she sees her lying in a
field of wildflowers
adrift in sweet williams,
asters and pinks
cradled in queen anne’s lace

her hair once the color
of taffy now streaked
gold by the sun
her freckles blending
into honey on her face

she closes her eyes to
drift along with her
feeling the breeze a
silk scarf unfurled
ever so soft as satin

until she hears as
from a distance far
a soft whistle blowing
faintly she nearly feels
an approaching train

but as she opens her
eyes the girl with the
taffy colored hair and
honeyed skin slips
away leaving her

in a small cold room
the whistle from the
tea kettle blowing
louder…steam rising
in the still dank air

she is brought ’round
her eyes glance about at
paint cracked walls to
a chipped tile counter
a clock chiming the hour

as she blinks back hot
salty tears to pull her
ragged sweater about her
she touches a dirty vase
holding a bit of wildflowers

© February 2013
Renee Espriu

This is for dVerse Poets Pub http://dversepoets.com/category/openlinknight/