The Truth of Hindsight

Hindsight is always better it is said
always invoking in me the transgressions
in my past of the egregious kind

conceived into an ethnically diverse family
curious of the differences, yet both drawn
and repelled like a moth to a flame

one of only a handful of such families
in an all-white neighborhood
though I did not distinguish it
then

my reddish skinned father and white mother
craving more but for unspoken reasons
spoken in private understanding

she from impoverished beginnings
he in accepting only European roots

agreeing upon only one thing in union
the dictates of societal norms for me
a child of the female persuasion

that marriage is best accepted sooner
than later & children are part of the
sanctioned outcome

but mind you if such an arrangement
is not a path upon which you wish to tread
then only professions of nursing
and teaching will suffice

for creativity in writing or artistic endeavor
will never sustain you in living
and you would know this
in hindsight

now in hindsight I only understand that
not everything that comes before
is better than that which
comes later

in hindsight I wish I had known that
choosing the passion of your heart
over being accepted
is what my path
Should
Have
Been

© Renee Espriu May 2019

Photo Taken From Public Domain Pictures & Created As Art

Passion

A Glimmer of Light

Leaving behind a passion of heart
in words left unwritten
words fading as ghostly images
when pen is not put to paper
when inspiration is set aside

always fearing unfounded criticism
of those you will never know
those never to breach your life

always choosing moral acceptance
rather than acceptance of self
acceptance of gifts setting idle
as dust settles upon them
as motes floating in air

ignoring a brilliance of light
that follows you in footsteps
as you close each door approached

a glimmering light shining
beneath its sill
until there is nought
but a darkening foreboding
becoming as tarnished silver
that no longer gleams

& only echoes fallacy of choices
that leaves voids want of filling
giving no purpose of self
as only seeking light will do
and in opening doors

© February 2019 Renee Espriu

Photo Taken From Public Domain Pictures & Created As Art

Brilliance of Light

December Passion

the Fall brought her to me warm and soft
with dark brown eyes and tiniest hands
reminding me nine months prior to the
month of December when passion ignited
fervor between cotton sheets and darkness
transforming cold into heated pleasure
where in the aftermath holidays came
filling the kitchen with baking of pies,
sweet sugary cookies warm from the oven
& the promise of love lasting a lifetime

© September 2017 Renee Espriu

This is in response to Jamie Dede’s Wednesday Prompt which you can see at
https://jamiededes.com/2017/09/06/portrait-in-february-a-poem-and-your-wednesday-writing-prompt. The photo below was taken from Public Domain Pictures
and digitally altered by myself.

Heart's Passion

Appreciation for Award

This award was passed on to me by Sreeja, who has a wonderful site that I suggest everyone visit. She is a very gifted writer who writes from her heart and with passion. Please visit her at http://writingonjusttowrite.blogspot.com  Thank you Sreeja!

The rules of accepting this award are as follows:

1. Thank the blogger who nominated you!

2. Share ten little known things about yourself.

3. Nominate six other bloggers for the award and inform them of their win… Fun!

 

The ten points about me….
1)  Creativity is my Passion
2)  My favorite colors are Green and Purple
3)  I have five adult children and some 21 grandchildren
4) I love to laugh at my own sense of humor
5) I love to hear other’s laughter
6) I’ve never traveled outside the US
7) I love languages
8) I am open to the study  of all cultures
9) I am ethnically diverse, therefore unique
10) I love the ocean…water in general
The six bloggers I am nominating are as follows:

Three Years Today

three years today not
tomorrow giving rise to
yesterdays filled with
sorrow and trepidation

angst beating against
us like rain drops to
pelt out songs of dismay
pain like no other

causing us to walk in
our own shadows trying
to keep the pain at
bay until another
day and still the rain

came down to wrap us
secure in the fashion
meant for bringing forth
life and love with
emotional passion

we wept in silence an
effort to be brave
standing fierce against
the onslaught of a
disease rending

you mute most days
covered in blankets
against the inner chill
freezing your blood
a prisoner your will

three years today not
tomorrow giving rise to
yesterdays filled with
sorrow and trepidation

we are unbelieving now
the sun doth shine an
unbridled warmth we
walk among the living
cautious to walk forth

secure in our hesitation
did it really ever
happen that cancer
took our lives now we
took them back again

© May 05, 2012

Renee Espriu

This is dedicated to a woman who, when diagnosed with Stage III Breast Cancer, took her faith and belief that all would be well and fought to overcome and now three years later is cancer free. Her faith and fierce determination carried her through.

Field of Wild Flowers and Queen Anne’s Lace

She summons the courage to
propel herself forward
back in time past school
yards covered in dirt
surrounded by chain link
fences with children
playing nursery rhymes

but all she really wants
is to lie down in a field
of wild flowers amidst
the queen anne’s lace

She wills herself to run
past youthful wiles of
teen age pessimism all
heart’s emotions a roller
coaster played out in a
game of self-fulfilling
hurt of loveless guiles

but all she really wants
is to lie down in a field
of wild flowers amidst
the queen anne’s lace

She takes determined steps
past hopeful dreams
anchored in the concrete
of city streets and high
rise buildings with a
widening gap of poverty
and wealthy ego schemes

but all she really wants
is to lie down in a field
of wild flowers amidst
the queen anne’s lace

She propels herself forward
past everything gone to
here and now trying to find
her spirit at last letting
go of the trappings of life
free to love and give back
passion of life in flying

so then she can finally be
able to lie down in a field
of wild flowers amidst
the queen anne’s lace

© February 2012
Renee Espriu

Sweet Aphrodisiac

Clamoring to the top a
precipice unknown as
silk unfurling
a banner adrift
on treacherous currents
carried along by
fierce determination

Passion unreserved
a love unbridled to
embrace a destination
mysteriously laden
sweet as aphrodisiacs
wonderfully laced
with wine’s afterglow

Not a single fruit
tasted nor a single
glass touched
only titillating
emotions encountered
clamoring to the top
precipice unknown

JOURNEY FULFILLED

© December 2011
Renee Espriu

Life’s Syncopation

Syncopation like a child’s feet
keeping in time without
ever questioning to a
teacher’s beat

Like ants always marching
like tiny soldiers
roaming over hills and
stones and bolders

Like the tap, tap, tapping of
computer keyboards
within the cubicle walls
behind office doors

Like raindrops beating against
window panes in an
effort to gain entry
into your domain

Like the heart beating within
a lover’s chest to reveal
passion enclosed as a
birded nest

Like the pendulum swinging
while the pianist plays
ringing clear as church
bells on a rope sways

Like nature’s cycles bringing
gifts of seasons always
changing without reason it is
about Syncopation

© November 2011 Renee Espriu

Illumination

The artist in you illuminates life
colors the canvas of whatever kind
chosen with images that swirl from
pen, pencil or brush filled with
passion and creativity a gift no
one can take because it is your own

© July 2011 Renee Espriu

I am blessed with three sons and one a fine artist.  He has enriched many lives, including my own. Thank you Nathan.

Whispers

Life beckons perpetrating innocence
unaware of unknown substances
coursing through veins imitating
blood in the guise of ink, of lead,
breathing life into that emptiness
now flowing as meaningful a a
river swift, unrelenting as the
heart pounding in her chest,
giving rise to words of beauty,
some profound, all with passion as
poured out onto paper with artistry
becoming life and all
else is but whispers in
the wind

                                        © June 2011 Renee Espriu