“Spinning Threads in Poems”

Spun words as a weaver spinning threads
upon her loom hoping that colors
will strike the brilliant chord

such as the composer who like magic
pulls each note threaded in the air
above him espouses
to encapsulate emotions
within the composition

whereupon they will be released
by those who listen
in tears of sorrow
tears of joy
or anger fleeting
as a doused
flame

with only the bliss
of knowing it was I
who lit the flame

that dances across
the reader’s face
as they imbue
their senses
with the words
of a poem

is all I envisage

© September 2018 Renee Espriu

Photo Taken From Public Domain Pictures & Created as Art

Poems and Threads

Before My First Breath

Image Taken From Morgue File & Digitally Altered

Dragonfly Blue

Dragonflies are timeless bold creatures
found in the amber fossils of millennium
as is innocence secured wonder cocooned
in everything I saw around me
whether it was earthen brown
or flowers christened
by the sun

I drank everything in endless thirst
always yearning to understand
and to grasp all the words
to weave into life
even when threads
were frayed

So the years did not diminish
my questions nor
bring solace
to answers

There is youth no longer here
when reflections are
made of wrinkled sagging skin
but youth only rests
within the perimeters
of my mind

So that there will yet be a moment
where the light shines bright
and the fire burning glows
revealing the happiness and joy
I felt in being aware

That there are those things timeless
like questions and answers
held within my mind
not loved nor cherished
with my heart

I know now without pause for doubt
there will always be
dragonflies

© May 2018 Renee Espriu

Silver Threads Of Nature

Two photos were taken from Public Domain Pictures and digitally altered by myself.

Silver Threads

I will leave you the peace in my soul
that will find you in the love of my heart

for I will leave you the memories shared
whether joyous dancing on the stage of life
or sadness fading in the shadows of day

for life has woven me a colorful garment
with silver threads of nature’s wisdom

that has hollowed out a place for you
where warm you will be in the sun’s embrace
followed by the path of a starlit moon

within which voices will sing in stardust
to lull you to sleep at the end of each day

where always you will wake to bird song
within which you will hear my voice true
giving you the peace within my soul
surrounded by the love within my heart

© January 2018 Renee Espriu

Angels Infinite

Stars and Angels

A symbiotic relationship in
a universe stretching infinite
where stars are like angels
their wings as chariots
taking flight becoming
a safe harbor for the soul
now desolate with grief
now hungry for peace
now joyous in its’ vision
however brief that it too
will be immersed
in that infinity

© January 2018 Renee Espriu

Anna’s Christmas Spirit … a short story

 

Anna's Spirit

Ella is sifting through her belongings again. She is trying to discern what items to give away, what items to simply recycle as no longer being useful. As she sorts things into piles she comes across an item that only sees the light of day once a year. This particular item has never been used.

The envelope is thin, yellowed and brittle, no longer closes and holds calendars of many years’ past.  These are her Great Aunt Anna’s Advent Calendars. They had been shipped to Anna from Anna’s cousin Regina. They cost little more than a dollar then and,  per the enclosed information, the proceeds had gone to research for the Epilepsy Association of America. The smaller business was called “Little Christmas Town”. This business imported Advent Calendars made in Germany.

She had opened these small aged Advent Calendars before but had always put them back within their fragile envelope home. One of Ella’s small legacies from Anna. Each calendar holding a snowy scenic Christmas town where windows and doors opened to reveal magical scenes of another bygone era . Their beauty warmed her heart. Something more visual of a time past. Something more than Anna’s school book and her Lutheran Hymnal, both written in German, of which Ella also had in her keeping. She knew Anna’s family had emigrated here from Germany generations before the ember of life was lit within her. This year she paused, hesitated, was reluctant to put them away again.

The Winter season had been very rainy and wet. One storm after another buffeted her door step as though in doing so it would gain entry, the winds driving it down in soaked blankets. Nature might appreciate the weather’s efforts at an attempt to beautify the outdoors but Ella could not. She never reconciled with Winter and unfortunately, Winter was the holiday season. This year all her sense of reason had simply vanished…vanished and was swallowed up by the long cold, wet days of unrelenting dampness. It seemed to be especially difficult this year. Ella’s heart seemed dark, sad, devoid of joy and happiness. The colors had drained from life, seeping from any object she set her eyes upon. It was like peering through a murky gray that lurks in sludge filled water. Visibility was nil. She needed something to lift her spirits. Memories of Anna began to spark. Little ones at first. Then gradually they became something more.

She was a young girl the very first time she met her. Her mother didn’t speak highly of Anna. She only would say that her aunt had rented to her and Ella’s father before she was born. A little house just right for newlyweds. But her mother was certain Anna had come into the house upon their absence to nose about. She would only say that Anna’s German roots precluded her to being so. Anna seemed tethered to always being right, being stubborn, being a woman of order and mostly a woman who liked to be in control. Ella had never met Anna so was only prepared for the worse. Yet,  Anna couldn’t be any worse than  her mother.  A woman of similar tendenacies coupled with a voracious temper.

It was before Christmas and for reasons Ella could not really understand, her mother had decided they should visit Anna. They went of an evening in the ’52 Ford her dad affectionately called Betsy. The night was clear and the Christmas lights twinkled, as though winking at her through the car window and as they passed their colors lighted up the night sky. She knew her aunt lived in the big city of Los Angeles but had never been there. The house Anna lived in was not big and looked much like most of the homes on the street where she lived. Her father parked the car by the curb and she followed her mother to the door.

Anna answered and seemed genuinely happy to see them. Her husband had died years before and she had no children of her own. Ella surmised that her aunt must be lonely. She wore a simple plain cotton dress, buttons on the top, short sleeves, a belt at the waist and sturdy black shoes with heals on her feet. Her hair that showed signs of graying was pulled up in a bun at the nape of her neck and she wore glasses. To Ella, she didn’t seem stern or stubborn but upon entering her house, she could tell Anna was a woman of order. There wasn’t a speck of dust to be found as far as she could tell. Introductions were made by her mother and Ella settled down, as she knew she should, to wait until the visit was over. She was surprised when Anna asked her to come to her as she sat in her chair in the living room. She hesitated but approached her as she was asked to do.

Anna asked her if she would like to learn numbers in German. Ella, always curious, tentatively nodded her head. Her aunt pulled her close and holding up two fingers, she began to walk her two fingers up Ella’s arm. With each step her fingers took her aunt counted…eins, zwei, drei, vier, funf, sechs, sieben, acht, neun, zehn. She stopped, looked into Ella’s small face, reached up and pulled Ella’s ear lobe. Ella was in awe and when she smiled at Anna, the game proceeded once more. After a few times, Anna encouraged Ella to mimic each number after she spoke it and Ella did. She would never see Anna again but the memory held fast as though etched in place and in time.

When Ella’s first granddaughter was small, she would play the same game with her, walking two fingers up her arm to end ringing the doorbell by pulling her ear lobe. Her granddaughter could not manage to imitate her nor speak the numbers in German but always the smile did appear. Each time Ella was enchanted and always Anna was near.

So, on this day, rather than tuck the Advent Calendars away for yet another year, she chose one. She would open each small window, each small door and look at every number, especially the ones she knew in German….one through ten… and would think of Anna. Now she had something to look forward to and the colors of her life began to transmute from their formidable gray into the bright colors of the holidays, like the twinkling bright lights that winked at her through the window of the car on a holiday night many years ago. Now, she had Anna’s Christmas Spirit with her and knew she was not alone.  She knew that the Christmas Spirit can be found in the most unlikeliest of places.

© December 2017 Renee Espriu

I have written short stories on my site in the past, which are under the heading above, but have not added one for some years now. The above story is based on some fact but has been written as creative fiction. I do hope everyone has a holiday season filled with peace. The photo above is mine which I digitally altered just a little.

An Infinity of Stars Woven

Within the landscape of time are
the shadows of war residing
casting doubts of fear
over hope filled integrity

for if I could but ease the pain
& erase the memory of horror
that slices through hearts
once laden with joy
I would

but there will always be those
who seek righteousness loaded
with weapons of destruction
their efforts devoid
of compassion

and soldiers who participate
on the battlefields of wars
whether at home or across seas
will carry scars always

and if it were possible within
me as a wordsmith to pen a poem
of salve and healing
I would

so that children may once again play
on peaceful soil under watchful eyes
of mothers and fathers
who can rest assured
of a tomorrow

filled with the spirit of love
& that fireworks will be celebration
& not the deafening voices
of bombs falling

for my soul cannot rest within me
until the vision of the universe
is the essence of peace shining
like an infinity of stars

the threads of woven fabric
like none that has ever been made
containing naught of the shadows of war
but a humanity of peacemakers
the gardeners sowing
seeds for the
future

© August 2017 Renee Espriu

This is in response to Jamie Dedes’s Wednesday Prompt. Please read more poets responses at https://jamiededes.com/2017/08/09/do-not-make-war-a-poem-and-your-wednesday-writing-prompt. The photo below was taken from the Morgue File and digitally altered by myself.

Field of Peacemakers

The Piano

The Piano

Altered Google Image

you set waiting amongst others of your kind
housing the large harp within your casing
standing upright and waiting for that one
that would love you enough to once again

lovingly ply your ivory keys with passionate
longing to coax musical notes waiting to
escape the dust that has settled upon them
in an effort to come alive, notes chording

to no longer set idle in bitter loneliness
but belong in the midst of those that would
wipe away the weary years with but a touch
of shine from joyous tears that melodies sign

will rise like timeless orchestrated sighs
bringing rays of light into lives one true
measure you will no longer wait in silence
but fill empty hours with unending pleasure

© March 2013
Renee Espriu

 

http://dversepoets.com/category/negative-capability/